The First Cut is the Deepest
by 17daysgreys
Summary: Jackson realizes he loves April Kepner, but when she leaves for Case Western will it be too late for him to tell her how he feels? M in later chapters.


Jackson Avery whipped through the E.R. doors hoping to catch his best friend before his shift ended. He and April Kepner had practically grown up together, medically, both starting their internships at Mercy West Hospital and now they were board certified surgeons at Seattle Grace Mercy West. He and April had pretty much gone through everything together, she was his rock, and if he weren't as blind as a bat he would have realized much earlier than her kissing him at the boards that he was in fact in love with her. It wasn't one of those burning loves that causes your body to ache with longing, no it was a natural love. One where if he thought about not seeing April Kepner, not talking to her, not looking into her hazel eyes, or hearing her laugh again, the thought of her not being in his life killed him. Yet, it had been two weeks since the boards and since they had had sex, and she was avoiding him and he wanted desperately to know why.

"Hunt, have you seen April?" Jackson asked.

"She didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?" Jackson was now panicking.

"She took the job at Case Western, her flight left an hour ago. I thought you would have known."

"No, I uh," Jackson hesitated, "I didn't know."

SIX MONTHS LATER

Jackson had missed his best friend more than anything and the feelings he had developed for her had only grown stronger. Sure they would text every once in a while, but nothing more than that. So, he was done with waiting and guessing, he was going to go out and see her. Hopefully she'd want him to.

"Dr. Kepner," a nurse caught her attention as she was leaving work, "Wyatt's waiting for you in the attendings lounge."

"Thanks Carol. I'll go up and meet him."

After she made her way to find her roommate, Wyatt Anderson neuro-fellow at Case Western and ultimate giver of backrubs the two of them made their way to her car.

"Hey, I can drive, you know if it's too much."

"I'm fine, don't worry about it."

"So, you're still going to stay mum about the whole subject, people are going to start to talk."

"Let them," April snapped back, "Because I have nothing to say to any of them."

"Okay, I'll drop it."

The next morning April headed into work as usual, put on her black scrubs and made her way down to the pit where an all too familiar face was standing, Jackson Avery. His blue green eyes felt like they were piercing her soul, her hands were shaking slightly as the nerves were searing through her body. What on earth was he doing here? She wanted to run, avoid any and all confrontation. He was her best friend but they ruined it by sleeping together and although she wanted more, she knew Jackson wouldn't have. So, she came to Case Western to avoid the humiliation of rejection, but now he was here which could only mean one of two things. He wanted her or there was a major disaster at Seattle Grace Mercy West, the latter of the two options seemed the most likely. However, April kept going with her day, passing it off as if she had not seen him and ran to take care of a patient in Trauma 1, turning to the side just enough for Jackson to notice something different about her.

About twenty minutes later she came out of the trauma room, praying that her mind was playing a trick on her and it wasn't Jackson that she saw, but someone else entirely who just happened to look like him. However, as she walked past the E.R. waiting room she saw him and this time his eyes met hers and she had no choice but to go and talk to him.

Jackson's palms were sweaty, which was a rarity for him. Normally, he was calm and collected and women never made him nervous. This was different. April was his best friend, his confidant, someone who never judged him for his looks or his money. He got up and started to walk towards her, as she was facing the nurses' station.

"April," he softly said.

"Jackson."

"You, uh, might be wondering why I'm here," he nervously shook out while he rubbed his hand against his buzzed head.

"A little bit yeah, it's sort of a surprise."

"A nice one?"

"Yeah a nice one."

"Incoming trauma, Dr. Kepner we need you," a voice called from the E.R.

"I'll be right back, don't go anywhere," she looked at him with her pure hazel eyes and Jackson could not dream of moving. However, as she ran away he saw, quite clearly, that April Kepner, sweet, virginal, a tad neurotic April Kepner was pregnant.

The trauma didn't take long and April made her way back to the E.R. waiting room where Jackson was sitting dwindling his thumbs and reading a magazine. She went over to sit next to him, but he seemed cold and a bit angry.

"I'm sorry about that, but you know how the pit can be."

"I do," he responded shortly. April was confused by his tone, he had been the one to visit her and now he was angry.

"Well," she started off trying to ignore his last quip, "Do you want to tell me why you came here?"

"Only if you tell me why you forgot to tell me that you're pregnant?" April's world began to spin, she had told only one person that she was pregnant and that was her roommate Wyatt and only because he had seen her wearing a tank top one day and it was pretty hard to hide.

Her mouth hung open but no words came out, she was for once at a loss.

"April?" Jackson pressed again, "So are you?"

"Yes." She looked down at the ground, almost shamefully.

"Why on earth didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't think you would have cared to know," she angrily spat out, "Come on Jackson, a baby is the antithesis of what you've ever wanted."

"Is this why you left Seattle, so you could hide my child from me?"

"I didn't know when I left Seattle."

"But how long have you known? Were you ever going to tell me?"

"Of course I was Jackson, I just didn't know how."

"It's pretty simple April, you pick up the phone and say 'Hey, Jackson I'm pregnant.'"

"You and I both know it's more complicated than that."

"Really?"

"Yes," she huffed, "Now, if you're done yelling I need to get back to work. I don't expect anything from you Jackson, so please if you're not interested in having a baby you can go. I really don't mind." As she got up to leave, Jackson gently grabbed her wrist and looked up at her.

"Do you really think that I don't want this? Why would I even be in Ohio in the first place? I want you April, I always have and I think I always will. Do you want me too?" She had never expected him to say anything remotely close to that, she had expected him to say that he'd support her and the baby, but not that he wanted her. Somehow, even when she had least expected it, everything seemed to be falling into place. So, she looked at him and opened her mouth to respond, leaving him with the greatest anticipation he had ever felt in his life.


End file.
